Thursday, November 18, 2010

Can't stay long

It's dreadful. We are only able to stop for a moment to tell you we can't stop - you see, we sneezed during a trade meeting with the next universe over and when we sneezed our hands flailed in such a way that the trade ambassadors were highly offended. They declared war on the spot. This is bad. WE NEED OUR POLYGLOT WHERE IS OUR POLYGLOT? BRING THE KOREAN AMBASSADOR TOO, MAYBE SHE HAS DIPLOMACY INSIGHTS HURRY! Padisha can knit me a hat so I don't get cold.

harried and worried (and hurried)
Jenna, Supreme BitchQueen of the Universe and Femnazi Extraordinaire

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

In Which Her Imperial Awesomeness is Accepting Applications

Dearly beloved subjects, we are here today to join you together with the knowledge that we are feeling our solitude a bit keenly. Therefore, we are searching for a consort! We have all the typical criteria: attractive, healthy, not brainwashed to assassinate us in our sleep, quick-witted, intelligent, and possessed of no ambition whatsoever. We want a man that looks pretty, talks nice, doesn't get all stabby with the knives at dinner, and will not attempt to take our throne. If you or anyone you know fits the profile, contact us! We will conduct interviews, and contrary to earlier such searches, we will not execute unworthy applicants. What can we say, we are feeling saucy.

Sincerely, Supreme BitchQueen of the Universe, Femnazi Extraordinairre, Gracious Tyrant, Wildcat in the bedroom, etc. etc.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

In Which Her Gracious Majesty Separates The Combatants

We arrived in time to hear what could be the start of a disturbance between our most honorable Duchess of Adorable Puppy Eyes and our celebrated Padisha Boom Boom, Friend To Cats. While we understand that we must have diversity in our Corset Mafia, and furthermore we understand that our Duchess of Puppy Eyes cannot always control the facets of her, shall we say, animal nature, and our Friend To Cats is marked by her affection for the very creatures the Duchess is instinctively against, we must have peace. We cannot bring peace to our peoples if we have not peace within our own house. We are, therefore, calling for a preemptive cease-fire on the possible hostilities that may or may not arise. That is an official order.